Harmony Rose West is a Family Health and Wellness Educator living on the land outside of Santa Fe, New Mexico. She weaves Parent Coaching, Women and Girl's Circles and Energy Balancing into a tapestry of services that have helped hundreds of women and children to grow stronger in body, mind, heart and spirit. She is the wisdom behind the Bless You Mom-Conscious Thoughts for the Parenting Journey Affirmation Deck, winner of the Mom's Choice Awards. Her Soul-Full Self-Care Series includes four books: Calm Down!, Get Grounded!, Nurture Yourself!, and Celebrate Now!
External url: http://www.amazon.com/Calm-Down-Reclaim-Soul-Full-Self-Care-ebook/dp/B00KPVQYJ0
Place one hand over the center of your chest. With your other hand, tap on the valley between the ring and little fingers, above the knuckle, towards the wrist. This is referred to as the gamut point. Breathe deeply, inhaling like you are smelling a rose and exhaling like you are blowing out a candle. Tap firmly about 10 times. Pause and take a deep cleansing breath. Tap about 30 more times. If you are still feeling fearful, tap on the other hand. If you feel better after tapping for one minute, imagine how good you might feel after three minutes!
Please refer to the book for more details on this activity.
Not sure if it was the tap that calmed me. But, I have been doing this over 3 minutes. I was so nervous, that I was sweating furiously to tried calming tap - I am bit better now.
Make a three-finger notch out of the index, middle finger, and thumb of the right hand, and place them in the V of the throat right above the collarbone. Lay your left hand flat across your left side of your head with your fingers flat on your temples. Take three to five slow, deep breaths. Change hands and repeat on opposite side.
I placed it right, but I still think there is something not working. Would appriciate some help.
I tried - was kind of choking. Can anyone help me with a image or something for this finger on throart !?
Right over each eye, in the middle of your forehead, are neurovascular reflex points which calm the nervous system and can be used to reprogram emotional and mental responses to stress and trauma. These are great points to hold for any emotional overwhelm. Hold these points on yourself or have someone else hold them for you. Help calm a child or another adult by holding these points for a minute or two.
Place your open, flat palm on your forehead while thinking of your stressor – or don’t think of it, it’s up to you. Take in a few deep breaths – breath in, like you’re smelling a rose, and then slowly breathe out like you are blowing out a candle. Try and hold your forehead long enough so that you can feel a pulse underneath your hands. That’s a sign that blood is coming back into your forebrain. This is a good thing! It means your body is exiting its elevated Triple Warmer state and realizing that it doesn’t have to run or fight. Having enough blood in your brain so you can think clearly is a very nurturing gift to give yourself!
Using the electromagnetic energy of our hands, we can anchor our attention and intention to the calming of our body’s energies. This self-care exercise takes about a minute to calm down the stress response but it is worth its weight in gold. The more often you do it, the better you will feel. Rubbing neurolymphatic points brings core life energy, also called chi or prana, to your constantly changing and evolving energy systems.
Starting at the navel, move your hands one inch above your navel and then one inch out to either side of your navel. Using the tips of your fingers, rub these points deeply for 10-30 seconds.
Put your right hand on the left seam of the side of your body, underneath your breast. Wrap your left hand around your right arm, holding just above the elbow. Hold this position for at least three deep breaths. Reverse sides, again holding for at least three deep breaths. Who knew hugging could feel so nurturing?
I hugged myself almost 6 times this week. I felt like I am a baby and my mom is securing me.. Feels so great and loved.. Secret is I loved myself
Wrap your right hand around your left arm, above your left elbow. Put your left hand under your left knee with your fingers pointing inward. Hold this position for one to two minutes, while breathing deeply Switch by holding your left hand above your right elbow. Wrap your right hand below your right knee. Hold this position for one to two minutes, while breathing deeply. It’s important to remember that you hold both points on the same side of the body, then switch sides.
I was in big pain... Sedate the pressure point for couple of minutes.. It was a relief after spending a whole day in pain.
I feel so calm. Never heard of this technique earlier. I am glad ... It was weird but I was much relaxed!
Rest your face in your hands, wrists touching with your fingers at your temples. Hold this position for two breaths, breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth. Inhaling deeply, lift your flat palms two or three inches, smoothing from your temples to above your ears. Exhaling, slide your palms down and behind your ears. With firm pressure, continue down the sides of your neck, and hang your hands on top of your shoulders, pressing your fingers into them. Stay in this position for two deep breaths. Then drag your fingers slowly over your shoulders with pressure, and draw your hands down to the middle of your chest on your heart chakra. Take a deep breath, and feel compassion for yourself. Each smoothing behind the ears takes only about 20 seconds, so if you did this simple routine three times, you would have one full minute of deliberate nurturing self-care.
Day one of this activitiy to smooth behind the ears is done!
Stand with your feet shoulder width apart. Tune into your level of stress. Take a deep breath as you bring both of your arms straight out in front of you with your palms clenched holding all that stress. Keep your arms straight and solid so they feel like they are two unyielding steel bars. Hold, hold, hold your breath, squishing the muscles in your face. Keep holding your arms out in front of you with your palms clenched as tight as you can. Now, exhale audibly as you drop those arms down. Do this two more times. Feel how much better you feel, and bring this feeling to the rest of your day!
It is bit hard for me .... Not getting it right I think..
You can do this active meditation while you feel stressed, or here’s another idea, before you feel stressed. Sit comfortably with your spine straight and arms and legs uncrossed. Close your eyes and watch your breath. Slowly inhale and exhale for a minute or two.
Now tense your right leg and foot as you hold your breath. Tense it more… hold, hold, hold, release, exhale, and let your leg drop. Do the same with the left leg and foot. Inhale and hold your breath as you tense the muscles of your buttocks. Hold, hold, hold, and release your butt downward as you exhale. Tense your shoulders and raise them up towards your ears as you hold, hold, hold, and exhale while letting your shoulders drop. Tense your right arm and hand as you inhale and hold, hold, hold, exhale, and release. Repeat with your left arm. Now open your eyes widely, open your mouth and stick out your tongue. Release, and now scrunch up the muscles of your face. Exhale and relax. Scan your body to see if there is anywhere else you need to focus. Feel how much tension has left your body.
Bring this ease into the rest of your day.
Wow, it seemed like I released tension from every body part.. legs, hands, shoulder. I am not only exhaling carbon dioxide, but stress, tension and worries as well.
Every morning, I meditate for 15 minutes without fail. It energizes me for the rest of the day!
Sit tall in your chair. If possible, turn away from the computer monitor, or even better, shut it off. Silence your phone and any other devices in the room. Look out of the window or at something beautiful in your space. Slip your shoes off if you can, and feel your feet flat on the floor. Let your spine grow long. Take a deep breath in through your nostrils and let it out slowly through your nostrils. Relax your jaw. Release your tongue. Ease your eyes.
Take another deep breath IN, and at the same time roll your shoulders UP towards your ears. On the EXHALE, roll your shoulders BACK and down (let the shoulder blades try to kiss each other.) Do this three to five times, inhaling as you roll your shoulders up towards your ears, and exhaling as you roll your shoulders all the way back and down. Set an alarm, and do this exercise for one minute every hour. You will have less stress, more energy, better clarity, and more ease in your day.
Wow, I just did this for 10 times. I never knew I was so tensed. It kind of ached for the first few times then it worked ... Woow I feel so light now.
Rolling my shoulders... not only I was feeling much relaxed. But, also it relaxed my shoulder pain. My shoulders were stiffened and it irritated me. Deep breaths....
You are going to rub the area where your arm meets your torso, called arm attachment stress points. With your left hand, find the area on the right side of your body where your arm joins your torso. With pressure, massage the length of your arm-body connection. Breathe through any uncomfortableness: inhale through your nose like you are smelling a rose and exhale out of your mouth like you are blowing out a candle.
If any area is tender, it means rubbing it is beneficial. Switch sides and rub the other arm attachment points.
It really felt so so relaxing ... beyond words.
First, while standing, begin with the homolateral walk or march. Lift your left leg and left arm at the same time. As you let them down, raise your right leg and right arm at the same time. Repeat this march six times. Now, cross crawl march. Lift your left leg and right arm up at the same time. As you let them down, raise your right leg and left arm up at the same time. Repeat this cross-crawl six times. Do the homolateral march six more times. Do the cross-crawl twelve more times. Always end this sequence with twice as many cross-crawls to remind your body that you want it to remember to cross the midline.
While trying this I realized, I am focusing so much on my movement that I am not focusing or thinking about my stress. That is lovely.
Worked for me - in one go.
Stand with your open hands on your thighs with your fingers spread. Feel the energy travel down your legs, and imagine your feet connecting to the earth. Inhaling deeply, circle your arms widely over your head until the fingertips and thumbs of each hand meet, making a pyramid. (Keep your hands in this pyramid position throughout the exercise.) Exhaling, bring your fingers down to your crown chakra at the top of your head. Inhale.
Exhaling, bring your thumbs to your third eye, the point between your eyebrows. Inhale. Exhaling, bring your thumbs down to the point between your breasts, known as the Sea of Tranquility. Inhale. Exhaling, bring your thumbs down to your navel, and flatten your hands so they are resting in a pyramid shape beneath your navel. Inhale. Exhaling, bring your flattened palms back to the starting position on your thighs. Inhale. Exhaling, smooth your open hands down your legs and bend over, hanging your hands down by your sides. Inhale. Keep bending over as you exhale. Inhale and return to standing. Exhale as you are standing.
I tried this exercise, but I don't think I could do it properly. Instead of reducing my stress, I got more stressed. Was feeling weird.
Your aura can be massaged! This will help you feel soothed, balanced, and more peaceful. Briskly rub both of your hands together. This clears off any stuck energy while simultaneously energizing your hands. With open hands, place your hands a few inches above your head and slowly massage your aura’s energy downward. Sweep the energies from your head down off your toes. Experiment with different movements: try slow or fast and short or long movements. When you are done sweeping the energy downward, try fluffing your aura. With both hands, roll your aura’s energy forward, with your hands circling one another, as if rolling a ball up your body. Pay attention to any areas where you want to linger. Choose for this to be a way to interact with your own energy as you bring yourself to the present moment.
Take a one minute walk around the inside of your home. Notice all the abundance you have. Open the pantry and refrigerator, and notice all the food you have that you didn’t need to gather or hunt. Walk to the faucet and feel grateful for running, clean water that flows right out of the pipes. Go to your closet, and run your hands over all your clothes as you feel this abundance of material possessions. Not everyone has this abundance. Don’t forget that.
Choose to feel grateful for what you have. Thank the roof over your head, your warm bed and your soft pillow. Move into your day with this gratitude in your heart.
When you wake up, lie in bed for a few moments and decide that as soon as you place your feet on the floor, gratitude will be your first utterance of the day. As you place your feet on the floor, speak your thankfulness out loud:
“I am thankful for another day on this planet, thank you for these strong feet. I am blessed to live in a country with toilets and running water. Thank you for these lungs which breathe me, thank you for my tongue which allows me to speak. Thank you for this water for my tea. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for such a soul-full ritual to begin my day.’
Said it clearly and loudly; "I am thankful for another day on this planet. I am blessed to live in a country with toilets and running water. Thank you for these lungs which breathe me, thank you for my tongue which allows me to speak. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for such a soul-full ritual to begin my day.’
Sit for a moment and feel a bubble of energy around you, like a beautiful glowing ball of light. Imagine this protective sphere is pulsing with clear oxygen. Like the movement of air produced by fan, this oxygen is effortlessly circulating all around you. Now imagine that you are flowing like the stream of air, fluidly, and easily. As you bask in the luminous light and free-flowing air, visualize that an invisible power moves with you, helping you travel through your day with a sense of magical grace and ease. The law of attraction teaches us that what we focus on expands. Focusing on life being more graceful and filled with ease is worth putting your attention on. Why not focus on creating more grace and ease in your life? What have you got to lose except that stress?!
Find a place to sit quietly for a few moments. Bring to mind a time when you felt you did something so wrong that you could not be forgiven… you still haven’t forgiven yourself. Imagine, sense, and perceive a bright light, at the top of your head glowing down into you. Let this light embody God, Goddess, Spirit, Source and feel this energy beaming through you, around you, above you and below you. Feel this light shining within you, filling you with love and forgiveness. Decide to put down any grievance you have with yourself. Experience yourself standing powerfully in this present moment in this precious day. Feel how much lighter you feel. Thank this light for its healing presence as you move into the rest of your day with clearer frequency.
Remembering that mistakes are normal and natural, actively teach yourself (and your children) how to be accountable by rectifying a mistake following this simple three-part message: 1. Say what happened in a neutral way-a just-the-facts type of communication. “I really wanted you to get ready quicker, so I threw your coat at you and accidentally hit you in the face.” 2. Say “I made a mistake.” 3. Then ask, “What can I do to help?” Perhaps your child will want a hug, perhaps you can do it over again and toss the coat more gently. Perhaps a smile is all that is needed to clean up the situation. If you consciously use this three-part-message as an accountability tool, you will learn responsibility, forgiveness and great communication skills.
At the end of your day, before you crawl into bed, either using your hands or a feather, begin at the top of your head, and pull the unwanted energies down and off of your body and your energy field. Imagine, sense, and perceive a hole in the floor, and put those energies down the hole into the earth. If something in your life feels particularly heavy, slowly drag your hands and gather this heavy energy. Clean the energy on and around you. Now, feel that your aura, the energy that emanates from you, is clear and ready for your dreamtime. Peaceful dreams…
No doubt about it… every single one of us makes mistakes! Think of a mistake that you made. (You don’t have the power to change anyone else’s mistake!) What do you need to do to make this mistake right? What needs to happen for you to let go of that wish I hadn’t done that feeling? Do you need to apologize? Do you need to call someone and talk it out? Do you need to forgive yourself? If you don’t take time to make the mistake right, it’s like dragging a dead horse behind you all the time. It’s dead and done with. You can’t change the past. Make it right and you will feel so much lighter.
As a matter of fact... When I do something wrong, I cannot have peace of mind. Unless and until, I confront. It haunts... Acceptijng my mistake has always been my key to stress-free life.
If a friend asks you to do something, and you feel a clenching in your belly, stop and take a deep breath. Pay attention to what your gut is telling you. Just pretend you are a toddler and your time is your own. NO, it’s mine! It’s okay to say no. It’s healthy to say no. No is a strong self-care word. If you are having a hard time saying no, tell her you need some time to think about it. “I’ll get back to you tomorrow,” gives you time to think about how to take care of yourself. Remember, women have been taught to take care of everyone else. Nurturing others is a very good thing, just not at the expense of you. Say no. No. No. No. No. No, thank you for asking me.
Each choice you make today will evoke feelings of joy, stress, happiness, and anger... all respectable responses. In taking the high road on the spiritual path, will you choose anger, or will you choose bliss? Today, if you are at the bank, could you choose to chat with others in line instead of silently fuming at the length of the line or the slowness of the tellers ? If your computer crashes, will you incessantly call the local computer wiz or will you exhale, knowing the computer will be returned when it is ready... at the perfect time. Both are choices, both within our rights as humans. What type of day do you want to create? Everything teaches us... the computer, the bank teller, the slow talker at the meeting who is never on subject, the cashier, your neighbor, the dog. They all gift us choices in every moment.
Take a butt break! Or a butt-rub break! Get off your rear, and let’s rub that butt! Right in the center of each buttock, in the back of the most prominent part of the upper thigh bone are a few acupoints that LOVE to be rubbed-hard! You don’t have to know where they are exactly, just use your thumbs and deeply massage both the sides and center of your buttocks. Tending to your little ole butt in this way may help to relieve frustration, irritation, hip pain, sciatica, lower back pain, and rheumatism. And it made you feel silly and you smiled, didn’t you?!
This was an awesome rub. My goodness. I was having a pain .. now the rub relaxed me... Seems like I found my acu points..
Cross one arm over your chest, place it on your opposite shoulder, and rub away for an entire minute. Make some noises: moan, grunt, and let the ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ out… you know you want to. Breathe in deep, rich breaths and exhale your newfound relief. Now switch sides and take another minute, a full sixty seconds.
Two whole minutes just for you, precious self-care time. After these two blissful minutes, notice how much lighter your load is. The benefits of these quick massages are cumulative. A quick massage today, another tomorrow, and before you know it, those shoulders will feel more and more tended to. As you re-enter your day, try to keep your shoulders down and a bit more relaxed. Remember, you don’t have to carry it all!
Wooooh.... it was such a relaxation. My shoulder was heavied down with pain and stress, but this one minutes did a miracle. Loved it.
Set a time for 30 minutes. When the timer goes off, stop what you are doing and take a minute to yourself. Breathe in and out three times… take nice slow deep breaths. Smile and feel that sweet energy fill you up as you re-connect to yourself. Bring this mindfulness into your work.
Don’t forget to set the timer again for another 30 minutes!
This one is NICE!
When a challenge is bearing down on you, stop and face north to the direction of the ancestors. If you don’t know where the direction north is, consider where the sun rises from your dwelling; this is east. If you were in a circle, north would be one quarter turn to your left from the east. Just stop and stand in one place. Breathe deeply and imagine that you have an inner compass that is magically directing or guiding you towards a feeling of confidence in yourself. Feel the stress melting off you. Feel your ancestors standing behind you, anchoring you with their strength. Hold onto this invisible, yet tangible, feeling of support. Remember challenges are opportunities in disguise. Put some stress down, pick up your compass, and navigate in calmer waters.
Was stressed out.... just faced east and felt my forefather holding my back.. It was more of a realization. Feeling strong!
Today when you are feeling frustrated; stop and clap your hands together. The simple act of clapping can interrupt a pattern on the spot. Something is out of your control, and you are not going to resist it. You are in a hurry; your child is dawdling. Clap! Take a breath and realize your child has his own sense of timing. Can you move him without feeling stressed?
You see the mud on the bathroom floor. Clap as you remind yourself bathrooms get dirty! Can you tell yourself that you will probably wash that floor 100 more times in your life? The tire is flat! Darn! Clap! It’s time for a change of plans. Tires get flat. Do you want this one thing to ruin your whole day, to make you feel crazy? Make a decision to go with the flow. Frustrations are inevitable. How you deal with them is a choice. Transformation of your frustrations may only be as silly as a clap away! Laughter is very healing medicine!
Find a peaceful place where you can have a serene moment to yourself. Put your hand over your heart and feel compassion, acceptance, and love for yourself. Tell yourself that you are exactly who you are supposed to be and becoming who you choose to be. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. Nothing needs to be different for you to be content. This present moment is enough.
Close your eyes and take a deep breath, and imagine you are observing whatever is bothering you on a movie screen. This observation encourages you to feel detached from your problems, because you are no longer experiencing them, you are observing them. Now, ask yourself some questions and listen for the answers: What am I feeling? What do I need to know? What would bring healing to this situation? What would bring me peace?
The more attention you give your inner witness and the more you use it, the stronger resource it becomes for you.
First, luxuriate yourself in a bath with a few drops of your favorite essential oil or a giant handful of sea salt or Epson salts. Massage your entire body with a bath salt made with coconut oil, or softly brush your skin with a loofa while you listen to peaceful, relaxing music. Take this time to nourish your body temple. When you’re done with your bath, instead of pulling the plug, getting out, and stepping back into your busy life, sit in the tub while the water slowly runs down the drain. Start to deeply clean underneath your fingernails, one at a time (using the fingernails on the opposite hand) and tell yourself ”I am letting go of what doesn’t serve me. I am letting go of holding on to anger, resentment, jealousy…” whatever it is that is metaphorically under your skin. Feel the water as your ally, gracefully supporting you as you let go. Feel the negative energy being carried with your body’s dirt down the drain. Now, splash cool, clean water on yourself, and re-enter your world feeling a whole lot cleaner and lighter.
I tried bathing with Lavender oil. It was really rejuvenating...
Sit for a moment and bring to mind a hard interaction you had recently. Maybe you grabbed your child’s arm too hard. Maybe you yelled at someone you love and wished you hadn’t. Maybe you wanted to be supportive to your friend but that’s not what came out of your mouth. Take a deep breath, and let the memory dissolve. Feel it leaving your mind and heart, easily melting like chocolate on a hot day. You made a mistake, and it’s over and done with. Make a decision to forgive yourself. Now, right in this present moment, do it over again in your mind. You can’t take away your old action; yet you can replace it with something more kind and gentle. You can communicate with a lighter touch, a softer voice, or supportive words in the safe, gentle shelter of your own mind. Doing it over again helps you forgive yourself for not being as strong as you meant to.
Today, pay attention to your inner self-talk. When you notice that your self-talk is judgmental or unkind, stop. Imagine a small hole in the floor next to you. Put your hand on your head. As negative thoughts come to you, gather the thoughts and direct them symbolically in your dominant hand while inhaling. Exhale and throw these judgmental thoughts that you are holding into the imaginary hole, letting the earth absorb them. Sound silly?! It is also silly to believe everything you think! Put your hand on your heart and smile as you gift yourself compassion. As Buddha is known to have said… You, as much as anyone else in the whole wide world, deserve your own love and respect.
If you find yourself in the midst of such a situation, simply place both hands over your solar plexus (waist) with fingers touching in the middle. Begin to breathe into your hands as you envision a golden light filling your center of will with strength. You can do this without anyone taking too much notice of it, and it will calm you down and help you restore your sense of personal power. The solar plexus is at the top of the lower pyramidal body energies and is where we digest our food - mental, physical, and emotional.
Should a potentially stressful situation come up where you have advance notice, yet sense that you are not feeling strong enough to prevail, take a five minute break before going into the room. Go to the bathroom and into a closed stall. In the stall, perform the above exercise, but using more breath control and deeper breaths. Should you happen to have a Citrine stone handy, put the stone under your fingers as you breathe for added energy. Citrine is valuable as it is only one of two stones that never need cleansing as it does not hold negativity.
Do a Temporal Tap: Using the three middle fingers of your left hand, tap around your left ear and temple, to the back of your ear, all the while verbalizing what you no longer want to do. I no longer bite my nails. Tap firmly and with conviction. Tap front to back about five times, keeping your strength and commitment intact. I no longer bite my nails… Do the same tapping on the right ear. Tap from your temple around the back of your ear while you are verbalizing what you DO want. My fingernails are growing and pleasant to look at. Tap like you mean it. Feel it as you tap front to back about five times. My fingernails are growing and pleasant to look at. Repeat this as often as feels right. The more you tap (like each morning and evening… hint, hint), the quicker you will affect your nervous system and thus your field of habits.